Pat your own back-off get your own sandbox

Recent developments in Ho-Ho technology have left famed Young Ortist British (YOB) Damient Hurtz shattered. Manufacturers of new Cheeselette Notoriety-Bomb Ho-Ho's, Practical Lint Inc, have recently announced their shark fin and butter-maggot filling has always included formaldehyde - something Hurtz dementedly bragged about bringing to the masses just ten short years ago.

Hurtz's sculpture The Physical Possibility of Life in the Mind of Someone Dead, which includes a 20 foot cloud of formaldehyde floating in a tiger shark was just the first in his campaign to bring awareness of the necessity of more formaldehyde in the typical human diet.

This new admission from Practical Lint that for years their Ho-Ho's have been even more nutritious than was at first believed has left Hurtz running to casualty for emergency hand surgery (he had his hand surgically attached to his own back tissue several years ago in a non-Arf related accident.)

The Warm in Irunt

memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole memory hole the memory whole the memory hole the memory hole the memory whole

Belligerent Bunnies

Emily Carr (no relation) is a recent graduate of the Emily Carr Institute in Vancouver. For her graduation project, she created a blog that depicts dozens of people dressed up in bunny costumes, a few people in the act of vomiting, a homeless man in a sleeping bag with his shopping cart beside him, several fetching women (Carr is an admitted lesbian), notable art works by not-well enough known artists, and oblique criticisms of all manner of writers, artists, celebrities, books, ideas and opinions, in Canada and abroad. The blog is called B=L=A=C=K=F=L=I=E=S LANGUAGE E=X=P=E=R=I=M=E=N=T=S and though it has experienced no promotional profiling whatsoever, it is nonetheless looked in on daily by many artists and writers internationally, all of whom seem to enjoy its merciless pluck, venomous wisdom and scatological brio.

Imagine Carr's surprise when some anonymous people wrote in to tell her that "bunnysuits are obscene" and have been trademarked by the Olympic Organizing Committee and she was breaking the law by using the bunnies on her blog.

"Sure enough, an investigation showed that Canada had passed Bill C-47, the Olympic and Bunnysuit Markings Act, legislation that provides the Vancouver Olympic organizers with extreme power over the symbols and language linked with the Olympics, including bunnysuits and Canadian Mounties" she writes in a commentary on her blog.

She went ahead and continued to update the blog anyway. It garnered enough attention that it earned a Vancouver Sun review, but unlike the other four blogs reviewed by the Sun, Carr's blog wasn't given a prize.

"Had the Vancouver Sun been so intimidated about liability issues pertaining to any formation of 'Vancouver 2010' ," she wonders, "that they wouldn't hand over the prize?"

Appropriating objects from our culture is necessary, Carr argues, "relevant issues become visible to a broader, public audience, challenging the notions of political authority, as a result."

After learning that she may find herself in an expensive and protracted court case if she continued to update he blog with bunnies, Carr instead sought permission from VANOC to continue updating the blog. It was granted, but for only limited applications. She met with Colin Jarvis, VANOC's manager of Commercial Rights Management.

"When I met with Mr. Jarvis, he was very accommodating and open to answering all my questions. He assured me that VANOC's position is that they are not interested in litigation with artists and that artists have a right to critique.

"When discussing my blog, Jarvis said that VANOC would not have a problem with it. However, if Carr put stickers on bill boards across the Downtown Eastside advertising her blog, there would be a problem because that action would be considered more in the light of my creating a 'campaign', as opposed to displaying works of art. "So how do I know where the threshold is before I cross the boundary into creating allegedly illegal art?" Carrs asks rhetorically.

There is only one way for her to find out. At Vancouver 2010, Carr intends to go for the gold.

situationist détournement meets kabbalistic anti-capitalist procedural writing : (Human Resources) by (Rachhel Zolf)

“Human Resources combines a ‘take no prisoners’ attitude with cogent analysis and scientific proof to make an engaging, wickedly irreverent, and iron-clad case for healthfully reading. If I had it in my power, I’d provide a free copy to every young woman in the developed world; we could then become, instead of the fattest next generation in history, the healthiest.”–Sina Queyras , President, PETA

"Human Resources dishes up scientifically sound information that will change your health and your life. Its 'in-your-face' approach is at once engaging and humorous, and belies its serious and well-researched underbelly. It’s the spark that will start your personal revolution. Pick it up. Read every last word." –Sharon Harris, Ph.D., Torontoist

“This book is an absolutely hilarious read because the authors treat you like they know you. They yell at you, they insult you and they call you some very nasty names. But since they are giving out their strongly-held beliefs and advice on living -- and you know in your heart they're right -- it is refreshingly in-your-face funny.”–Maggie Helwig, The National Post

The Tender Buttons Oath

cupcakes / filled is not wrong
What a Blacker Heart You Have! And that's a Mighty Good Thing! An Awesome Doorknocker of Ebony Cast of iron and aged with an antique finish, this lion knocker dropped his body like an acorn, a loaf of sugar melting into hardened human limbs.

Cancer hadn’t taught us anything that I could not have committed those grimes as I was passed out cold on the floor due to drugs and alcohol.

'Untitled' (1969) by Robert Ryman (b. 1930)

47.0 x 46.2 cm (18½ x 18¼ inches)

Acrylic polymer on fibreglass panel

B=L=A=C=K=F=L=I=E=S
LANGUAGE
E=X=P=E=R=I=M=E=N=T=S

! SALUTES ! ROBERT RYMAN

Ladies and Gentlemen i give you Jeff "there's no escape from the master-slave dialectic" Derksen

In interviews Jeff Derksen has cited Syd Barrett and Pink Floyd's first album The Piper at the Gates of Dawn, as well as the music of the Ohio Players as the only influance on his "craft".

Derksen claims that he has never been consciously influenced by poems or poets and attributes the any recognizable elements in his work to the sounds of having grown up in BC. Although he claims that it could certainly be just the influence of "flouride in the jello" . Derksen's fondness for spaghetti westerns is evidenced by the book he wrote in 1994 called "Trouble in Tidy Town's Poison Heart" winner of that years Archibald & Gerald Lamprey Memorial Reward.

pricks

O;u;c;h;i;e. I work with MFA's, and a couple of them are s;e;m;i;c;o;l;o;n junkies. Every s;e;n;t;e;n;c;e; must contain some; s;e;m;i;c;o;l;o;n;s; just for e;m;p;h;a;s;i;s. I told one of them if he ever used one c;o;r;r;e;c;t;l;y, I would give him her k;i;d;n;e;y back. Clearly, I have n;o;t;h;i;n;g to worry about, that u;s;u;r;p;e;d kidney of hers will remain all m;i;n;e.

AXES, BOLD AS THE LOVE GUNBOAT, AND OTHER DUNE BUGGY ATTACK BATTALION BALLADS FOR FLEDGELING SLUSH PUPPY GURUS

the rose you grind is not the axle we grind, for the perfume we're making
is brighter than 1000 suns) (whereas we all know its your place to be content
with the condiment selection of rainbow papers had at Office Depot.



One question keeps zinging to the very heart of the NY School and all it's world-wide-wanna-bees, a question that still needs to be debated:

Is Franky O’Hara’s trademark NY school habit of name dropping (often first name dropping) a conversational technique to bring in the reader, or is it an elitist trait to mythologize his buddies? I don't mean to belittle someone's personal problems, but it's highly doubtful, therapeutic value aside, that any of Franky O'Hara's poems would have ever seen the light of day if it was, say, the handiwork of a sincere but anonymous screamo teenager, or an antisocial stone-walled wailer type instead of the star of The Breakfast Club, Gremlins, Ghostbusters and Short Circuits #1 and #2. As it stands, Franky O'Hara's work doesn't stand up, grab you by the balls and/or shake you with its hard-hitting talent. He writes with all the earnestness and unschooled sincerity of a heartbroken eighth-grader, except he also elects to name-drop (everyone from Demi Moore to Jon Bon Jovi's wife to Roy Kiyooka gets a plug) and stud his oeuvre with katsup, mustard, relish and mayonnaise. All his poems really exhibit is a rather shallow view of a lifetime worth of lunchtimes misspent and a belief that his problem of 'what shall we eat for lunch today' supercedes everyone else's, but what else would we expect, hotdogs cooked by the light of 1000 suns?Let's hear it for Franky.

My Favorite Vortex of A, E, A, E, A, E, AEIOU, and sometimes Y

The 29-year-old former Poet was cleaning her carpets when she came up with the idea for Eunoia, which sells for $ 125 through insidevoices.org

She saw how a piece of rubber that had got caught in the nozzle was gently resonating in the air flow. She also felt a soft stimulation to her fingertips as she tried to remove the rubber. Intrigued, she next did the unspeakable...

At the time "Lemon Dog-Gone from Calgary", had not had sex for 5 years following her graduation from a local advent garde writing school church.

She said: "In my attempts to alleviate my many inconsolable frustrations, I began to wonder what I could do. I noticed how the rubber moved in the top of the vacuum. It seemed to beckon. I let myself be seduced. The rest is herstory.

"After several hours, I came up with the prototype. The first time I tried it I reached an orgasm within 10 seconds. Powerful stuff."

"That was when I knew I was on to something that could potentially bring pleasure to all women, regardless if they liked poetry or not. I named it after the a book which destroyed all that unnecessary pent-up sensuality inside me."

"I played with eunoia all during college and my first year of grad school. I couldn't help myself, yet I also couldn't get enough of it. My newest ex-boyfriend kept it so I don't know whether it survives to this day -- he threatened to rid the world of it, thought it was a horrible device. But I have to say, for those 5 years it was in my life, it put out my greatest burning fires even if I had strapped the sucker on all day, it was fine, I was happy and fulfilled. Around year 5 the clip-on clip broke, but it still held together well enough to use, I noticed, so I continued my daily rituals. I would buy this 'toy poodle' again. It's very powerful for such a little thing, and it's about as cheap as cheap thrills are ever likely to get."

Review Written by Jessie Smith, "Poet-Scholar", devoted daily user of eunoia for 3 years in a row (Virginia)

AND NOW, A MESSAGE FROM OUR SPONSOR

The National Socialist Mustache-Rides-For-Free "Got Porn?" Campaign is one of the most recognized and respected advertising campaigns in the history of such, having earned a place in advertising history, where all the advertising history is historicized. As the "umbrella" campaign for print, radio and TV advertising, as well as public relations, promotions and other bourgeois initiatives that seem to matter but which really don't, the snappy "Got Porn?" message has become one that's been on everyone's lips across the U.S. of A. ever since it was written into the script of an episode of Dora the Explorer during its fourth season. Of course, that was just the tipping of the scales in a profile project that was but a dream to many a few scant years ago. Yet, since its inception over 10 years ago, this fun and compelling message has helped boost awareness of the nutritional aspects of porn, and was the impetus behind expanding the availability of porn to more consumers than ever before.

Porn now competes with an ever-growing number of artforms in a category that is one of the most competitive, most advertised and well funded. Despite porn's being outspent by other art froms, like poetry, in ad dollars, the Porn Processor Professorial Education Program (PPPEP) has achieved extraordinary levels of awareness and education about the health and nutritional benefits of porn in post-secondary educational facilities across the land, through this very humble ad campaign.

Nibbly Thing. Jessica Simpson found her husband's porn stash, and demanded that it be returned to the Vatican where, as everyone knows, the largest collection of pornography and other clandestine literatures the world has ever known are preserved and archived for everlasting posterity. Way to go, Uncle Joe Pope!

a heart-shaped patch of inappropriateness.

...where you write about Duff's pantys sitting on your dresser ...while you masturbate nearby ...creates a watermark for this heat, this frost freeing all of us, getting us into your own juices and breath, your pussy and your hands ...your ship and your rudder. What did the power of this act ultimately make for you? Were you internalizing information along the way? It's a finger on the way to epiphany, "writhing and grunting" a larger part of yourself loose in order to build a newer frame. At the point of orgasm we hear the klaxon of the pantys -- contact finally made, and something's made more whole along the way. it was just one of those, it was just one of those, it was just one of those N = I = G = H = T = S ...

from 'beyond good and evil cupcakes'

Ron and Marie Disney's Web Page and Trivia blog offers the internet's only fame and notoriety, due in large part to its popularity as a controversial Blog. Debuting on August 22, 2002 to little fanfare and without expectations of an audience, it is now (arguably) the most influential English-language blog on the world wide web that is devoted to contemporary poetry, poetics, CIA mind control and South American torture techne. By August 2006, much to everyone's surprise, the Blog had reached 800,000 hits. By early November 2006, the Blog had welcomed its 900,000 th visitor. In the early part of February 2007, the Blog had surpassed 1,000,000 hits, or the actual number of books in print by the internet's other poetic invention, Mickey McStrange AKA Flarf Mclennan -- a fictitious blog set up by the Government of Canada to ensure that no one would want to read poetry, contemporary or not, in the not too distanced/jaundiced future.
Interestingly the government of Canada has a long history of black ops arf projects; see Honeymoon Suite, Glass Tiger, Douglas (I'm on tour with The Police) Coupland and Robert Bateman (a well known artist and serial killer) .

A Rain of Bullets Drowned Out Our Comrade's Cries

is that a spyplane you're holding, or are you just happy to see me?

Smoke drifted out from a signal grenade Acorn had detonated minutes before in a desperate bid to show his sonnet platoon members they were shooting the wrong men. The firing had stopped. Acorn had stood up, chattering in relief. Then the machine gun bursts erupted again.

"I could hear the pain in his voice," recalled the young poet a few days later when The League of Poets investigators interrogated him at length. Acorn kept calling out that he was a "friendly", despite his asocial tnedencies, and he shouted, "I am Hilton [expletive] Acorn, damn it!" One shellshocked comrade recalled: "He said this over and over again until he stopped."

Myths and other lies helped shape Hilton Acorn's reputation, and mystery continues to shroud his death. A long-haired, fierce-hitting "Poet for the People" with the Purdy Brigade of the League Of Canadian Poets, Hilton turned away a $3.6 million contract after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks to volunteer for the war on Po-mo, ultimately giving his life in combat in Vispo-Taliban-infested southeast Alberta.

R=E=S=T=R=I=C=T=E=D, ONCE AGAIN, WITH FEELING, FOR THE IMPRESSIONABLE YOUNG MINDS IN THE AUDIENCE

MOST ADULTS ENJOY MATERIALS MADE WITH ADULTS IN MINDWHY SOME ADULTS WOULD INFLICT INFANTALIZED AND INFANTALIZING NOTIONS OF THE WORLD ON THE REST OF THE ADULT POPULATIONIS A MYSTERY AMONG THOSE ADULTS WHO ENJOY MATERIALS MADE WITH ADULTS IN MIND

American Opinion:

Only about one-third of Americans today believe The Bible is absolutely accurate and that it should be taken literally word for word. The rest either feel that the Bible is the inspired word of God, but not literally so, or that it is a book of ancient fables, legends, and history as recorded by man.

As you can see, those post-grad mutherfuckers are messing it up for the the rest of us again.

I am disillusioned by recent events. Like most other people I had expectations for the Internet that were not met.

...maybe it does in fact take all kinds to make a world?

Vinyl is as au natural as lunch meat.
--Christopher Dewdney

Plastic silly pussy, with which I simulate, I mean stimulate, then splat, every face of reality in need of a smack, thus converting all the gee-wizard elements of the pocket-planet into my most uncommon emulsion, I mean emulation -- and it's brown today, the colour of a brownout. While I sleep, my automatons toil throughout the night, they have serious magics to work, transmuting everything into a openly mouthy phase of our dis tease, which is where my true love lies. But in secret, I really exalt with a swiffer genie, marveling to think that, in some landfill of the future not too far off but far off enough to not pose an immediate threat, yet still long after our own extinction, a single drop of my doodie might still endure, can you imagine? -- my stiffen griffin a roused. Ain't that something? I may not be like you but that's no reason for you to not exist. At least I would hope that you might allow yourself to exist. Existing is exciting. Try it sometime.

when eye close my eye deformed by Backstreet Boys in the Hood

Singing lesbian nuns who scream "Dominique" at 2am, despite ignored/repeated requests for 'The Boys Are Back in Town' by Thin Lizzy

Non-sticky sperm whales

Girls who think they have the biggest dick in the world, when in actuality its the smallest I've ever seen. }:]

"The S.N.F.U. L=a=n=g=u=a=g=e Lab Coat Types at S.F.U."

People who can eat their poem that weight on me in food and still never be hungry

Really prissy boys who take FOREVER to get ready to go anywhere!

Friends who call or talk to you when they have nothing to tell you or only want to hear about "whats going on with you".

People who charge their opinion to match yours because yours is righter than their left.

Up-skirt Cripple Creeks

Listening to Olsen Twins, or seeing Brittany at a Hilton somewhere in France

Lawyers, guns and butter

People who return, from the dead... or in turn, form the dead in a really CRAPPY condition.

When people quote the old testament book in their profiles.... WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!

Guys who hit on you when they KNOW you've been going out with the same idiot for over a year.

Wise Guys

Asshole's gaping anus

People who blare alt-Christan rap out of their pickup trucks in Alberta.

Bully by Larry Clark

people who think they are in bikinis or tiny clothes when we know damn well they've got the tent we'll be sleeping in tonight there on their persons

Movies that shell out 10 bucks and then ask stupid questions later

People who own a bunch of buddhistiva statues and don't know a thing about The Madonna or Cindy Lauper.

Prison Tattoos... nothing says overpriced more than bad prison tattoos

Razor X, Rated R

wwwwwwwsssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkwwwwwwwsssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Sky Spirits® announced today that its parent company, Calgary®-based Twin Evils Out The Chute®, has acquired X-Rated® Fusion Liqueur®, a beverage aimed at the Liberal Poet Market® (you know liberal® like we know better than you we went a-schooling® to learn that liberality® -- and we'd be the first to admit IT® IS® MIGHTY® FINE®.)

Do think about a little wine a little poetics a little whine a dash of brine and some pus suckling from your new friend's muncie®

[...o0o0o0o0o00o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o...]

View, sample and bye very good books by pretty good people

A poem about the Pope begins, somewhat hopefully "Any poodle under ten inches high is a toy." Baxter Black Monroe unveils his new collection of cowbell poems and a two-ton poodle with running lights or a mutant frog on a leash dripping yellow pus where it wanders... City Dog Catcher this is NOT who they were looking for, indeed, it would seem you're barking up the wrong tree? ... Maybe today good day for you to go fly a kite? (Not to mention breast and body shape, but god forbid we should ever mention THAT until we have cable syndication) ... The stills hardly resemble Monroe at all. But I am not saying Baxter Black Monroe never did animal porn.... We can't ever know if he did or if he didn't... We've narrowed your sexy favorites down to the final round of 16, and now it's time for you to select this year's top American Superstar Symbol daughter's dance talent soon... Then she began to walk, babysteps at first, and then when she was only 2 Rochelle tried to copy the moves to the Nutcracker, Good Ship Lollypop, Mama Said Knock You Out, and other favorites ...

Wha? You No Like my pre-fab Ho-Hos? Methinks they REAL good...

Satire (from Latin satura, not from the Greek figure satyr) is a literary genre, chiefly literary and dramatic, no more no less, in which human or individual voices, vices, follies, jollies, abuses, obtuses, shortcomings and longgoings are held up to censure by means of ridicule, derision, burlesque, irony, and many other methods, sometimes with an intent to bring about improvement, sometimes just for the pure sport of it. Satire is used in graphic arts and performing arts as well. Although satire is usually witty, and often very funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humour but criticism of an event, an individual or a group in a clever manner. Sometimes this works and sometimes it does not, but the main thing is that the satirist keep on keeping on, trying to get it right. Satire is to be distinguished from parody, which sticks to the form of the piece being mocked (see previous post, "Bridget Riley Soiled Panties" for a good example of parody). The similarity to comedy is that "in satire, irony is militant". Satire usually has a definite target, which may be a person or group of people, an idea or attitude, an institution or a social practice. It is found in many artistic forms of expression, including literature, plays, commentary, and media such as song lyrics and now, in blogs such as the B=L=A=C=K=F=L=I=E=S LANGUAGE E=X=P=E=R=I=M=E=N=T=S. Often the target is examined by being held up for ridicule, typically in the hope of shaming it into reform. A very common, almost defining feature of satire is a strong vein of irony or sarcasm. Also, parody, burlesque, exaggeration, juxtaposition, comparison, analogy, and double entendre are devices frequently used in satirical speech and writing – but it is strictly a misuse of the word to describe as "satire" works without an ironic (or sarcastic) undercurrent of mock-approval.
N.B. = Satirical writing or drama often professes to approve values that are the diametric opposite of what the satirist actually wishes to promote. Since this seems to confuse most of the people in the world, and has been known to even make them violently angry in some instances, it is for this reason that satire is often thought of as one of the most challenging and demanding modes for a creative person to work within. One must not only tread the fine line of being cruel to be kind (which leads to unpopularity), but they also have to contend with a lot of suckasses who don't get it, and who won't ever get it (which leads to hilarity). It is because there are these types of people -- The Don't-Getters -- that satire was invented in the first place. It has officially become the last line of defence for those brutalized by the rigid homogeneity of a suffocating monoculture.
So if you don't happen to enjoy the balm of satire, that's just too fucking bad for you, isn't it? Why don't you start your own collection of Holly Hobbyhorse Memorabilia? Or, at the very least, begin to admit to yourself that you are one of the billions of Don't-Getters that are fueling the barbs of satire in the first place? You're the one who wanted to be a superstar -- being harpooned by lampoon goes with the territory...

Where your splat at ?

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
ooooooooooooooooooooooo

wow, it will just totally suck if the album sucks… a new poem by ron padgett

when
the
cops
come
and
kick
in
your
door
with
their
jackboots
are
you
really
going
to
be
willing
to
admit
that
you
are
the
emperor
of
ice
cream?
admit
that
you
got
a
year
in
Paris
on
a
Fulbright?
admit
a
spiritual
exhaustion
and
diffuse
feelings
of
rebellion?

tupac spelled backwards is caput

Krispy Book: This is an eye-opener right here. Hopefully, for all the youth, kids, I mean, even the grown-ups, everybody, I hope this is an eye-opener, man. Word up. 'Cause they should see, right now, that poetic trickery is not the key, and that it's real. Vispo is real, Karl Kempton is real, you know, all that stuff is real, man, Kenny G is real real dope and It's up to us as artists to take responsibility for what we're saying in our poems and in our Snarf Boks and things of that nature, you know, like the community. But it's like, you can't water down the words, you can't water down the schooling, all you can do is lead the hose to water and hope by golly its thirsty. It's like, when those shots go off, the kid, the average kid in a poetry boot camp can't close his eyes to it. The kid's dehydrated, needs some water. And the stuff may be everywhere, but can you actually drink any of it? Can you swim in the water, like I mean, sure, there's always a risk of drowning, but can you put your body in to the water and still be copasetic? This is not a television show yet, this is reality, some real-life heart of the poesy. And its coming for you... its coming for you now.

Keep-the-lights-on-Soft-Sell-sale! Forty per cent off!

It all falls into place on the very last page! -- The Kute Kit Cat Robot Poetic ! Direct from the Snarf Bok Press at full retail price, including special "limited editions" ! The contests are just a merchandising front for the press, so they can make more money! And the winners of the various contests only get coupons for a percentage off of the Snarf Bok Press books, so even with the grand prize coupon (50% off) they still make a decent profit, (standard retail markup being 100% of wholesale price, so a Snarf BokPress book that sells for $40 costs, (say Canada Post by Jason Christie) the store $20, and probably costs the cool people over at SNARF Boks only about $3 to manufacture (remember they get Canada Council moola). Labor of love indeed! Nuff said! And, they make you pay $30 a year for their glorified catalogues! But hey, its not as though there are enough corporate brochures in the world. We need more! Plant a tree today to insure the future of Snarf Bok Press tomorrow. Your 3 legged grandchildren will thank you for making the world a safe place for corporate brochures.

Dave Franky's Karla's Web's Engrish

things i'm happy to have behind me:

1) big conference in honour of Frank Davey's brilliant Homolka research
at York that made it difficult for me to take the bus like a normal person for the last couple of months (though I did eventually adapt.)

2) realizing that I don't REALLY want to go to The Black Mountain School (at least not right now) and thus not taking the GMAT of SCAT SCANS or what ever. (Am told there are blackflies in them thar mountains!)

3) johnny winter edgar Scientology

things that i'm very much looking forward to:

1) your sister visiting (she arrives tomorrow). I can't wait. I love your sister and I intend to ask for her hand in marriage. But first i'm curious to see if she'll do it before then. Oh yeah, its going to be good.

2) the Hillary Duff 8 minute concert and fun things that I am doing in the next few weeks with your sister (in light of #1); such as, going to the soda shoppe, windsurfing, getting ready for the costume ball (theme: bunnysuits), cleaning out the sump, etc.

3) reading ancient Greek in July with Franky - I really have to get into some of that golden ass!!!

things that I'm finding quite bothersome as of late:

1) hand wringing... which really just seems like the world was diagnosed as being bipolar/psychophrenic... somehow this one might always be on the list... the world shows no signs of letting up the error of its ways.

2) the fact that Jimmy Stewart seems more in touch with reality than any politician I can think of offhand, and as much as I love "It's A Wonderful Life", I'm just not sure how capable it is of influencing global politics... (I felt similarly about Mr. Smith goes to Washington in the late seventies...)

3) the "bizarre love triangle" performed by my three housemates, your sister and the wind-up planets on our balcony all gaily lip-synching to that mostly beloved New Order tune of yesteryear (Love Vigilantes also in the mix, ditto 'when doves cry'.)

things that have made me very happy as of late:

1) Franky passing his triathlon and being done with training, for the most part (i.e. a more normal life and time off from the army of the words...i.e. more time with yours truly ;-P)

2) knowing a lot of people who are being active for incredibly good causes, and being able to support them, financially or otherwise. I'm not sure what this means but it sounds good. (though it must be said, I do draw the line at volunteering my time...)

3) discovery of a new (at least to me) poet, dbnichol- he's dead - died in Iraq I think, during the Vietnam war.

4) Richard Wagner's music finally being on iTunes (and his new opera coming out in the relatively near future) and the recent TalonAudioBook release of Thus Spoke Zarathustra as read by Paris Hilton and the Olsen Twins.

5) watching "I Spit On Your Grave" with your sister until 2am (minus the getting up in the morning part) followed by a feverish reading of "I Spit on your Graves" by Vernon Sullivan (a.k.a. Boris Vian) until the sun comes up and then we fall asleep in a cosy ball on the shag rug

6) summer starting to be available at the market

7) getting a fun amazing new laptop (and recording equipment....mmm, garageingarbageout and I will be good good friends very soooooooon)

8) real personalized snail mail-art yum yum, arf!

so, I suppose if push comes to shove I need to be thankful that at least I'm out of jail and your sister is coming to stay with me!!!!

Walt Silliman

In some ways the beliefs and practices of Walt Silliman look back to an earlier period of magical poetics, a trip backwards as far back as twenty years before Silliman's own time, to the era of Pre-Blog. Yet Silliman, who was born in the good old US of A, was possibly (if you believe his version of the story) directly involved the great surge of Langprop that took place late in last century (if you believe that such a thing happened). It may have, but most of us blinked.

Suppose Silliman is just too annoying to save Poetry... its a stretch, but what if? Then his poems could be seen as a metaphor for the West's reluctance to tackle issues such as Aids in Africa but still act like something is being done. Maybe better to think of him as a Live Aid Poet able to show up on a moment's notice for a half baked-bean fund raiser. He is just another example of those tireless self-promoting Poets who view the "community-as-consumers". You know the type, you went to school with them (or did they go to school with you?)

Silliman says language "cleaned my clock in a Los Angeles motel ... she was quite a feisty". Presumably he means that his poems are like the hookers he shares with Jeff Huth as they travel the country attending conferences and preforming at benefits.